COWBOY POETRY: Angus and the Turkey

Bryce Angell is a cowboy poet. Angell was raised on a farm/ranch in the St. Anthony, Idaho area with approximately 75 head of horses. Horses remain an important part of Angell's life. Angell shares his poetry with Cache Valley Daily every Friday.

Old Mose, the cook, got drunk and left the ranch without a trace. Thanksgiving was a
day away, so Angus took his place.

Angus knew his cooking skills were certainly no winner. But he made a promise to the
men they’d have a turkey dinner.

For sure they had a turkey ‘cuz it gobbled every day. But when Angus opened-up its
pen, that gobbler ran away.

The turkey ran right through the cows. Then up, away it flew. The bird weren’t never
coming back. Now what would Angus do?

Angus yelled, “The doggone turkey flapped his wings in flight. Somebody must have
warned him, and I tell you it ain’t right!”

The cowboys all thought Angus had completely lost his mind. And now without a
turkey, well they sure were in a bind.

The cowboys figured Angus prob’ly was a little slow. And just to have some fun each
fessed they’d let the turkey know.

Well Angus wasn’t fooled. He’d let them have their little joke. But, he couldn’t buy a
turkey, up till payday he was broke.

Hank, the oldest, spoke right up and said, “I’ll make this brief. Don’t care if there ain’t
turkey. Can’t you see I got no teef?”

Thanksgiving without turkey is like pepper with no salt. Angus thought how could this
be? This mess was all his fault.

He grabbed his double-barrel and set out to bag a bird. He had to find another one. He
gave the boys his word.

Well Angus kept his promise, cooked his bird a golden-brown. He’d shot a big tom
turkey. Took him hours to run it down.

Charlie took a drumstick, and he chomped down nice and tight. The lead BB he bit on
broke his two front teeth outright.Hank gobbled down the turkey even though he couldn’t chew. But hoped the heavy shotgun lead would make its way on through.

When the holiday was over, Charlie had a bad toothache. Hank muttered, “Was I gut
shot? Your wild turkey, bad mistake!”

Did Angus keep his job as cook? He’d cooked his best and more. But I’ll bet you next
year’s turkey is a Butterball for sure.

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